Adam Buxton – Off The Hat Cuff

The Transcript:

Stuart Hardman
Welcome to Get Shirty, the podcast where we ask our guests about the things in life that just never failed to irritate and get them all shirty. The chat focuses on home, work, and going out, but could go anywhere. And it’s not all German gloom as each guest gets a mate of measure shirt which they design, so we talk about that too. Funny that, us being tailors.
[Music]
And our guest today is Adam Buxton. Adam first came to prominence in the early 90s
on Channel 4 in the Adam and Joe show with his comedy partner Joe Cornish, which also then
made their success will move to radio at XFM and then 6 Music, and he hasn’t stopped working since.
From TV and movie roles, to writing his bestselling ramble book, and of course hosting one of the
country’s biggest podcasts, the apply titled, Adam Bucxton podcast. We talk about a range of
irritations from loud pubs to hotel etiquette and more. Do be warned, the language is a little
fruity at times and there’s even a little singing, so something for everyone I suppose.
So here we go. Three tailors, two mics, one guest and a host of irritations. Let’s get shirty.
[Music]

Adam Buxton
I really like podcasting because I am quite a self-conscious person, right.
And when we used to do TV stuff, me and Joe Cornish, when we made our TV show on Channel 4 in the 90s,
the Adam and Joe show, we made it ourselves. And so we’re both quite vain and didn’t want to look
terrible on camera. So we would take a while to light it in a flattering way and we would edit it
ourselves and things like that. And the first time that we went on regular TV and someone else
was filming it, I was quite alarm. I was like, oh no, I don’t like it. It’s like the difference between
when you take a selfie and someone takes a photograph of you and you go, that’s what I look like.
It’s a bit of a shock. And so when we were on the radio, me and Joe, it removed that whole
element of self-consciousness, the visual element. And so I don’t really understand,
from that point of view, why people are now, I mean I do understand why people are filming
their podcasts because they can put them on YouTube and you get more views that way and things like that.
But as far as I’m concerned, the nice thing about the audio medium is that you don’t have that
layer of anxiety about what you look like. You just focus on the conversation.
Stuart Hardman
I’m not very good at hearing myself, but we’re in a band together, it means you. Oh yeah. I sing, well, I perform at the
front and I’m happy just being an idiot, jumping about and being daft, but I don’t like watching
it back in case I see something, I go, oh, I don’t, in my head, I don’t look like that. And I know it will
stop me from doing it next time.

Adam Buxton
Yeah. So if I watch it, you know, so I don’t tend to like watching it all.
I mean it is quite good thing to do. I remember watching a documentary about Jerry Seinfeld when he was
going back on the road after years of not doing stand-up while they were doing the sitcom. And there was
another comedian in there called Orny Adams, who was a younger comic. And he was like a comedy scientist.
And he was one of these very ambitious comedians who takes it super seriously. And part of his
process was to film and record every gig that he did. And then he would go home and he would log the
tapes and he would sit there and listen back to every show that he did. And he would make notes. This is
what I screwed up. I screwed up the punchline there. The timing could be better on that one. And so he was
like hard core. And that is a good way of improving. No doubt. On the other hand, I think it takes some
of the fun out of it. And I think sometimes it turns it too much into a science rather than something
fun. Yeah. And I think it’s that thing, isn’t it? It’s like if it’s not fun. You start. Yeah, especially with
music and things like that. You’re trying to capture a little feeling, aren’t you? What kind of music you play?

Stuart Hardman
Got pun for the name. So we’re called Dance Commando. And it’s stuff that you can dance to.
Okay. That’s the idea. So, old school stuff like Roachford, Chic.
Did Hush, did Hush? Well, we do a sort of Kula Shaker version. Through to stuff like
Gay Bar, some Chillii Peppers stuff. So it’s all just stuff where we can go and set up somewhere.
Everybody gets to jump about for a bit. Yeah. Have a good laugh. See you later.
And off we go. We were playing original numbers. When I was about 20, we started sort of writing
that sort of stuff and thinking, oh, this all goes somewhere, but you know, the covers, people
only ever wanted to hear the covers. So we just kept with that.

Adam Buxton
What sort of style were you writing it?

Stuart Hardman
Probably a little bit too earnest, you know?

Adam Buxton
Of course, it’s always a bit too earnest.

Stuart Hardman
We did a biscuit version of strange brew, you know? Just about biscuits and biscuits that we like and show.
But it’s fallen into my brew. Yeah, that’s sort of thing. So it was, yeah, sort of d’arça.

Adam Buxton
I’ve got a biscuits jingle.

Stuart Hardman
Oh, yeah. It’s that going out on that?

Adam Buxton
Yeah, I’ve used it a few times.
Biscuits. I am in love with you. I’ll dip you in my tea. But pull you out before you fall apart.
I want to band and you, biscuits.

Stuart Hardman
I nearly thought I’d join in in there.

Adam Buxton
Well, that’s as far as I’ve got. I did feel like I think this is a brilliant song and I should finish it,
but I couldn’t get beyond that. That’s all there is for biscuits. Yeah. Yeah. I like, I’ll pull you
out before you fall apart. Come on. Yeah, it’s good. Yeah, it’s good. It’s good. It works on many levels.

Stuart Hardman
See ours was more, was bit more literal now. I’ve been dunking, so it’s their d’arndar. I’ve been dunking
so long. My biscuits gone soggy and it’s dropped into my brew. Bump, bump, bump, bump. Yeah.

Adam Buxton
I’m going to use it as my next,

Stuart Hardman
but you’re welcome to that.
I will welcome you to the Get Shirty podcast and you can say it then. Mr Adam Buxton, how are you?

Adam Buxton
Very well, thank you. Thanks for having me. It’s beautiful to be in Tunbridge Wells.

Stuart Hardman
Tunbridge Wells have you been to Tunbridge Wells before?

Adam Buxton
I don’t think I have.The best thing about Tunbridge Wells, apart from this fine establishment.

Stuart Hardman
Thank you very much.
The best thing about Tunbridge Wells, if you’re coming to Tunbridge Wells for the day,
the Pantiles and the High Street, it’s probably a good, because it’s where the cafes are and the
history is and there’s a few bits and pieces to see. That’s probably where people gravitate from,
come out of the train station turn right. That tends to be the area that people go to.

Adam Buxton
Where are the Wells?

Stuart Hardman
The Wells, the spring, the Chalabit, or that’s not quite the right way, it says, the way I’ve
always said it, but there is a better pronunciation, but the Chalabit spring is on the Pantiles.
It’s where the good and the great used to come and take the water. That’s why it’s got its royal
theme, because the Wells used to come down. I think I’ll probably get in the history very badly,
wrong if we had our own fact. And should they sell? They sell bottled water, do they?
If you could, well, take water from the spring, but they don’t bottle it and sell it. Why not?
Because they don’t want to sell out. I don’t think it could keep
enough going. I think you can get a ladle full. Okay, and that will do you. Yeah, but it’s very iron
ease. It’s good, it’s good for, good for your walls, but…
Could they chemically synthesise it? I couldn’t they analyse what is great about the water from
the Tumbridge well and then just mass produce the living shit out of it? Yeah. Well, I think once
this podcast is out, I’m sure that’s that’ll be the next thing. Yeah, yeah, it’s a, it’s a really,
mean, it would be great. Obviously, if they did remove all the living shit out of it.
There’s a really good music venue in Tumbridge, I was called the Forum. It’s been running for a
long time now. I won’t put a date to it. But there’s, so there’s two sort of springs. There’s a,
there is a well there right outside the forum, which has got a little gate, a little sort of
fenced off area where I don’t think they can take water from there, but I think it feeds from
there into the spring on the Pantosh. But the Pantosh used to be run by a, a chap called Bo Nash,
who’s very, he was very instrumental in Bath. He used to run all the, sort of,
entertainment in Bath as well before sort of retiring into… Bo Nash. Was he a wizard? Bo Nash. Yeah.
Bo Nash would be… Oh, that was his name. Oh, your name’s so much cooler. Yeah. Bo Nash.
Oh, right. Bo, yeah, Bo Nash was his name, but he used to run all the gambling Nash.
Yeah. Oh, I’m thinking like, first of all, I thought he was Bo Nash. My name is Bo Nash. The ashes of my
bowls were created many hundreds of years ago. And then I thought it was Bo Nash from, you know,
India or something. And, no, no. Both of those things are much cooler. It’s Bo. Bo. Bo Nash. Yeah.
So he sort of set up Bath and then came to Tamarjara, set up. Yeah, okay. The gaming houses. He was in
charge of the gambling on the penthouse. That’s what he was down there, sort of. Many, many moons ago.
So, yeah, so that’s probably the best bit to enjoy. So, I guess your very nice question. So,
how was the journey up through Tamarjara’s? It was fine, thank you very much. It’s not very far
from the station. If your, folks, if you’re considering making the journey to Hardman and Heming,
for your tailored suit meets, then may I encourage you to take your bike on the train,
if you’re not a Tumpbridge Wells local? And enjoy a very doable pedal. Not a couple of hills,
but it is strictly 12 minutes. Oh, was it? Yeah. Yeah. You were quite, but when we were in contact
before I, and you were quite clear that it would be this amount of time. Google Maps told me it would
be 12 minutes, and it was. It was good. See, for me, I don’t think I could do 12 minutes.
You’re a seasoned peddler. Yeah, I am a peddler. Yeah. That’s my one, that’s the best part of my,
that’s the best part of me is that is me and my relationship with bikes. Right.
Even though having said that, I’ve never been, well, I went on a sort of fun,
holiday where we peddle around France with my friend Garth for a few days. And you can go and pick up,
I really recommend it as a holiday option. You can pick up bikes and they take your luggage,
they plan out a room for you where you’re cycling through beautiful countryside and you end up
in a great little hotel and you can figure out like what kind of budget do you want, do you want
a kind of budget, do you want economy or super luxury or whatever, I think we went for super luxury.
Yeah. And they take all your luggage to the place. So you just have to cycle with your
right lunch box. Yeah. And so they move your luggage from
yeah, place to place to place. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it’s waiting there for you when you arrive.
And you’re not going miles the version we were doing, it was only, I mean 20 miles or something,
25 miles, which is, it takes you a few hours, but it’s totally doable. But I’ve never been on a real hard
core. I know some bloke get to a certain age and they think, oh, I’ve got to go hard core. And I know
these people who go to the Himalaya’s and they are cycling sort of 20 hours a day and up mountains.
I have never done that. Yeah, so you’ve never been tempted to find a group of friends or
wear the same matching outfit. And like, really yourselves up and big on. No, I’d be tempted to
avoid those people. Yeah. Yeah. So far. But never say never. Never say never. I don’t, I don’t think,
I mean, I’m much more suited to a tailored suit rather than I don’t think I’ve got the physique for
tight libra for the, what do they call it? Mammil middle-aged man in opera. I know this isn’t very
interesting podcast chat, but I’m getting colder and colder, sitting here and trying to put the heat
around. Because it’s all controlled through our phones. So the, no, I find I like it cold.
I think the wisdom in the chat show world is the colder the better. I think you don’t want your
guests warm too warm, right? Because then they get a bit sleepy and I went to New York once with the
band Travis back in the day and they were appearing on Letterman. And so it’s very exciting I got to
go with them on to Letterman and watch them rehearse and was wondering around the set before.
I can’t remember if I sat at Dave Letterman’s desk, but I was certainly wondering around it and
looking out onto the fake skyline backdrop and stuff. But it was freezing you could see your breath
and David Letterman liked to keep the studio temperature right down to a sort of mad degree
because it kept him sharp. I suppose that’s, for me the minute I, my hand, as I was saying early
before we started recording my hands tend to go freezing cold rather quickly. So I was sitting
there thinking, “Oh no, I guess this is freezing.” This is the thing I would prefer to,
I think I would prefer to freeze to death than burn to death. That’s a fun topic of conversation, isn’t it?
Well, the idea of the conversation today or part of the conversation is to talk about the things
in life that get a shirty. That might be a little bit extreme, burning to death, but I really
get some of my skin burning to death. At the last time I’ve heard it. I think it’s so great.
Well, it’s the sort of thing you can only do once. Yeah, the same with freezing to death, but I’m with you,
I think I’d rather slowly freeze to death than quickly burn to death. Well, I don’t know,
actually now I’m saying that out loud. Needless good. No, I mean, ideally it would be neither of those.
Things that get you shirty. Yeah, so the idea of the podcast, that is to talk about the things in
life, which, so it’s a two-pronged thing, talk about shirts a little bit, we’ve gone through your
shirt choice, and we’ve gone, well, you tell us what your choice was for your shirt.
Button down collar. Very smart. Not cufflinks. Yes. Was it pink? It was pink. Yeah, it was pink.
You remembered well. Yeah, so yeah, you went for a nice button down collar, sits nice and small,
stays nicely under the pillow, you jack it. Yeah, you haven’t got worry about remembering
shirt collar stiffeners, always end up in the washing machine, but not a single cuff square,
single cuff, no cufflinks. I mean, I do like cufflinks. Yeah. And for a while, I think people
usually give me cufflinks all the time. So I accumulated a collection, I guess they just stopped
buying them for me, but I had some good ones, I had some ones that were little iPods.
Oh nice. Yeah. First generation iPods. Yeah, yeah, good. And I had also some ones that just had
little birds on them and they just said tits. All right, even better. And you can get some quite good
sweary ones actually these days. Yeah, I’m not down with that really. You’re not down with this swearing
clothing in general, just… I think my mum got me the tits ones. Right, she had quite a sort of
silly juvenile slightly smutty sense of humor and she would give me, because I think she thought
that’s what I was like. Yeah. Oh, you’re silly. Look what I’ve got you. Like one year she got me a
little pill box. Right. Christmas that just said Viagra on. Right, nice. When I was in my mid 30s,
I thought, “What a weird present to give me.” Thanks, but… Yeah. Yeah. I’ll make sure I get that out
that every occasion, possibly. There wasn’t even any Viagra in it. Yeah. Yeah. I don’t know what she
thought I was going to put in there. Cocaine, as well. I never even did that. Wow. I just used it to
carry my earplugs. But that’s a good use for it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that’s nice. And do you still use it?
Or if you now, is it sitting on the shelf somewhere? It’s on the shelf. Yeah, it wasn’t very practical.
It was ceramic. Oh, what was it? It’s quite heavy. Yeah, that’s not, it’s not one for the pocket.
No. Really that, is it? Yeah. So anyway, yes, I got my shirt. Thank you so much. I’m very excited.
I mean, the thing is that, sartorially, I’m not up too much. I used to care about clothes a lot
more when I was younger and would take a few more chances, I think. But now in my middle age,
because I cycle around, everything’s all fleeces and cargo shorts and hiking shorts and a lot of
outdoor gear. Yeah. So it’s really nice to be able to take a chance with some nice clothing made by
experts. I’m a big fan of the right clothes for the right purpose and the right reason, you know.
And that’s part of, you know, bringing it round to suits, which you very commonly did, or clothing.
It’s, you’ve got to pick the right cloth for the right suit for the right occasion.
You know, if you’ve gone abroad and you don’t want to 18 hours wool, if you’re riding about, you
don’t want, you know, a pair of flannel trousers, either, you know, shorts, so it’s, you know, functional
clothing is good. I think it’s good. I think I’m wearing a Stetson Docker cap, this is.
That’s my new hat choice, because I was always a baseball cap wearer. And then I felt, I don’t know,
I still thought maybe this was a slightly more grown-up option. Yeah. Yeah, it’s good. I didn’t wear,
like a lot of people I respect think that men of a certain age who wear baseball caps are terrible.
I think Pete Dockety had, not that I’m the world’s biggest Pete Dockety in Liberty in Spain,
but I think he had a very withering line about the saddest thing in the world being men in baseball caps
or something like that. I was at a, a pair and see me and I’d finished work, got home and I do, like,
you know, as much as I like to think I’m looking smart all the time, I get home and I put on my
knot at work clothes and I went out the door, went to this parents evening and looked around me
and realized I was wearing the dad uniform, you know, two A dad, we were all wearing
Adidas trainers, chinos, a t-shirt with some sort of under-slated motif on it and baseball caps,
or flat caps. And I was just like, oh, yeah, oh, I’ve reached that point. Well, it’s hard, isn’t it? It’s like
food, you know, it’s people don’t have the time to be adventurous a lot of the time. But actually,
if you get into good habits or if good options are made available to you, it can really transform
your life. And I would love to be like, there’s this company called Riverford Farms, who are one of the
people that do delivery boxes. And you could go online, you can pick recipe boxes and it really
transformed my life. Like, I learned how to cook a little bit better and started eating better food
rather than always having fish fingers every single day for my lunch. Similarly with clothes, you know,
this is a, I was delighted when you suggested that I come and get a shirt and
and I’m getting a suit from you as well. Because I really love, you know, when you see someone like
Richard Iowa, for example, he always looks great. He always wears brilliant suits. I mean, it’s
different because he’s tall, he’s slim, I have a different body shape, so my options are a little more
limited, I think, or at least I need to think more carefully about them. But that’s exactly why this
kind of thing is a great opportunity. So if there are men like myself out there, what are they looking
at in terms of coming in here and how long does it take, how much are they going to pay for their
average suit? They’re good questions. Because those are the things that, those are the things that
have got me off, right? Well, that’s, and I think that’s the thing. I think a lot of people and
think that tailoring is a thing that, oh, that’s for other people, it’s not for me or it’s only a certain
sort of person that can go in or a certain sort of body type and all the rest of it. So I mean, the
really, the thing is to think about what you like and where your comfort zone is. That’s really
quite key and something that we talked about earlier, what you like, how you feel comfortable,
what you wouldn’t feel comfortable wearing. It’s all just sort of work questions. I tend to think
about it. What, what, what do you want it for? Where are you going to wear it? Sort of how off? And
that’s not a lot of question, but how often are you going to wear it? And the why, the why of the suit,
you know, that’s really what you got to think about. And that’s the same for anybody, whether you’re
tall and slim, whether you’re like me, sort of, podgy round the middle, all of those questions are
sort of relevant about the why of the suit. The reasons behind it. Coswise, we’ve got something to
suit or budget. Do you think that whatever your body shape, there is a suit that would look good on you?
Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. You’ve just got to be a little bit careful about what
patterns you throw at yourself a little bit and also what style you go for. But there’s definitely
a style for everybody, you know, and the cut helps. You know, you can only put shape into a jacket
where a person’s got shape, but you know, but there are ways of wearing a suit which help, you know,
and, but yeah, there’s definitely something for everybody. Definitely something for everybody.
And, you know, but you’ve brought up, you know, interesting things, really people do feel self-conscious
about it. Any decent tailor should really spend time, even before you get anywhere near the
take measure, thinking about those things, talking about those things, and thinking about the why
and what is the outcome of the person wants. If you’re doing all of those things, then it should
be enjoyable, you should relax and actually have a bit of fun with it. Yeah. That’s the idea.
Well, I use this opportunity to get a suit and in a pattern and a color that is probably different
to anything I would normally get. Normally, I would gravitate towards dark colors and
pretty basic planes. Yeah. And, but is that is that for the reasons that you said that
yourself, conscious of you trying to blend in? Yeah, I think it’s just, it’s just a kind of unadventurous
urge to not stand out and not look stupid, I suppose. Feel like I can’t really get away with
things that are more interesting anymore. When I was younger, I discovered a covered full of my
dad’s old dress shirts that were colorless. Yeah. And he had a load of old suits in there as well.
And so I went through quite a long phase of wearing his shirts with the top button done up,
colorless shirts, wearing like baggy, his baggy suit jackets. Yeah. This was the late 80s, mid to late 80s.
And I loved the band talking heads and their concert films, not making sense, had just come out.
And me and all my pals loved it. And he in that film wears this crazy big theatrical suit
that have, I mean, it’s exaggerated giant shoulders and it’s a very important part of that.
Because that’s just got a real idea as well, hasn’t it? That’s right, yeah. Yeah, they just sort of
had again. We were, we were. And you’re talking about that the other day. Yeah, it’s a great film if
people have never seen it, they should check it out. I mean that music is brilliant. But
so I, in my mind, I was like, oh, I’m like David Byrne, I’m wearing, it was okay for me to wear my
dad’s baggy suits because it was, I quite liked the look, but I don’t know how good I looked. Well,
yeah, but I think a lot of it though is how it makes you feel. Yeah.
You see, if you feel a particular way, if you feel like, well, I’m like this person,
like my idol or, you know, and then I think, it’s great, because it’s all confidence. A nice part of
getting a tailored suit as well, or part of anything that you’re doing, if it’s feeling that, you know,
confidence, like talking to you today beforehand. I was quite nervous and you’ve obviously done
this a lot and I was thinking, oh crap, he’s going to fly into it. What a rage. Yeah, he’s got it.
He’s got it. He’s got it. He’s got it. He’s got it. He’s got it. He’s got it. He’s got it. He’s got it. He’s got it.
Beating people out. He’s got it. And all of those things were at the forefront of my mind. I
thought I’m, I’m going to have some sort of fist fight and it’s going to be, yeah, but it’s, I was nervous.
Things in life, which get you sure to get you sure to, yeah. And I know through listening to your
podcast, you’ve had your things in life where you’ve had your little run-in, do you, I think,
were quite similar in that respect. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I used to get into confrontations with public
officials at times. I’m glad to say that I had managed to eliminate that from my life largely. I had
quite an annoying series of hassles with my bank recently for reasons that I won’t go into, but
it involved a lot of very unrelaxing conversations on the phone and going into the branch and just
feeling like I’m living in the twilight center here. What the shit is going on. And I managed to keep
it together. Right. Oh, that’s good. And I, I think partly because I thought, well, you know, I’m always
preaching about like, let’s all get along and be nice to each other on the podcast. And for me
to be so nakedly hypocritical in my own life and just turn into a total asshole, just felt too much of a
defeat. And so I was able to be polite and patient. Whereas every fiber in my body wants to just
stand up and just go, you know what, fuck off. I don’t even need a bank account. I’m going to keep my
money in a tin under the bed. If I never see any of you again, it’ll be too soon. Bye. You’re all
shit. And that’s how I felt. But you kept it in. Is that like it? Have you found a like a new technique
to do that? Or is it just, I think it’s, I think it’s thinking a little bit ahead. Right. That’s what I
found is how are you going to feel? It’s the kind of principle of regret as a motivation, which
dominates a lot of psychology, I think. And you just think about like, how am I going to feel
after I’ve lost my shit? When I’m walking home or cycling home, I’m going to be so sad. I’m going
to think, I’ve made the world a bit worse. I freaked out of that guy who’s just doing his job,
even though I didn’t think he was doing it very well. I’m a dick. I made that person’s life worse.
I didn’t achieve anything whatsoever. I just added to the sum of misunderstanding in human misery.
So I was able to kind of get a glimpse of that. Right. And it stopped me. You see, I’ve done
about you, but I’m a chronic sort of overthinker. Yeah. You know, I’m, I’m a sort of after-tutter
at myself. Yeah. If that makes sense. Like an hour later or two hours later, I go,
out loud. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. My wife was going, what, what, what are you touching at? What did you do?
Oh, yeah. Well, actually, I don’t vocalize that that’s why I’m touching very often. Yeah. I’ll
tend to give some sort of excuse. And when you’re touching, are you thinking I should have said
something different? I’ve thought of a better thing I should have said, or are you thinking I just
shouldn’t have said anything? Yeah. Now I’m thinking about myself. I’m thinking, oh, I was not good.
You know, and I’ll replay the thing I said over and you know, there’ll be things about this
conversation. Now I’ll go home to, oh, that’s what editing is for. Yeah, which is good. Yeah.
That’s sure. He’ll make me look good. Absolutely. Absolutely. Of course, every, every non-psychopath
replays sections of more or less any conversation and just thinks, oh, yeah, I wish I had. But,
do you not think, well, I suppose, they’re the psychopaths then? I was going to say, do you not think
there’s people who just blissfully go through life thinking, wow, everything I said and did
there was absolutely fun. Yeah, I mean, there are certainly people who are more comfortable,
I mean, some people are just nice. I’m not saying you’re not, but somebody, I’ll take it otherwise.
Some people are comfortable in their own skin, easy going, they’re not going to piss anyone off
and they’re just drifting through in a happy haze, good for them. But, but then there are psychopaths,
I think, who couldn’t give a shit. And they’re just saying whatever they want and they’re not
really that fussed about what anyone thinks. And I suppose being fairly brazen about it as well,
well, that’s, yeah, it’s me. And then they’re often rewarded with high-powered jobs,
because people are impressed by them. Yeah. Because, because so many of us do replay things and cringe
at ourselves. And when we see someone who doesn’t seem to do that, we just think, oh, they know something
that I don’t. Yeah. They’re going to vote for them. Yeah. Well, that’s, I suppose that’s it, isn’t,
and that, although I suppose it’s why we do a degree regard, people who are in, like, the
end-stainless industry or musicians or film actors, they’re doing something that I can’t. Yeah.
And that may be the same with they, with they, they sort of, say, and do whatever I like, people,
I’d never do that. So they must have some special power. Yeah, I think that’s what you entertainers
to do sometimes, isn’t it? You’re, you’re sort of channeling a version of yourself that you feel
that you can’t get away with or isn’t available to you. Yeah.
Yeah, we’ve had a few little, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, niggles there, but we, we tend to split it up into,
well, we’re going to do four today. Okay. So we’re going to do a sort of, um, the Mars bar approach is
what, how I like to think about it, the work, rest and play. Yeah. So, um, but then we’ve also got an
off the cuff section and you will be the first person to have the off the cuff section. So no pressure.
Can anything go in there? Well, it, we have a, a bowl of hat with things in there. Well, yeah.
So it will be off the cuff. What do you, how do you, what the niggles about this thing? Wait,
it’s called off the cuff, but they come out of a bowl of hat. I know. I know. Now that might, it
might even be your niggle, but we couldn’t think of a way, you know, I could make a shirt cuff that
we then put the suggestions into, so it’s out of a hat, but the, the term off the cuff seem to work
because you’ve got to think about them off the cuff. Well, it’s just put them in a bowl.
Or does that work? Or you could, or they could be on the top of the hat and then they’re off the
top of your head. No, I don’t know. That doesn’t really work. Well, perhaps, well,
off the cuff is better. Well, it works in terms of the title, it doesn’t work in terms of pulling it
out of a hat. I mean, you could, are these things that you’ve already written down? So there’s subjects
or things that you’ll take one out of the hat and then go, oh, yeah, well, this, this is what niggles
might have. I mean, you could definitely write them down on a piece of paper, boil them in half and
then just pin them to the cuff. Oh, yeah. On one of your, you could tailor dummies and then you could
just pick one off the cuff. Oh, that’s much better. That’s more your lips. Yeah, yeah. You got all the
equipment. We have got all the pins. You got the tailors, dummies. Yeah, but we just didn’t think
about how to deliver the idea. Wow, that’s good. We should take that and use it. You’re welcome.
Work. What are the niggles about work? Now, this could be previous works. It could be what you do
now could be the act in or the podcast or go for it. Things that I’m dissatisfied with. Yes.
In the work arena. Well, let me just check because I actually keep a note on my phone that is
called Worsties. Oh, all right. And whenever I, I’ve got a, I’ve got a faves one as well. Oh, okay.
So it’s not all negative. Feel free to, you know, pull, pull out will from the list. Well, I mean, faves,
you got faves, you got things just to give you an idea of the, I want to prove that the faves list
actually exists. It’s very general greetings card type stuff I’ve got here seeing my children happy
music, laughing with friends and family, succeeding to repair something broken. That’s a good one.
When my wife looks at me lovingly and sidles over to give me a hug, you can’t beat the affectionate
side. But then Worsties, sitting down to watch a film that you’ve heard is really good. And then
realizing it’s one of those films that takes place entirely in one claustrophobic location.
Like buried and locked both starring Tom Hardy. No, no, no, buried is, is Ryan Reynolds, I think.
Of course, in either of those. No, don’t ever see buried. Do you like, do you like the idea of
being buried alive? Well, I don’t see buried. Because that’s all, once you start watching buried,
you’re just in a box when Ryan Reynolds and then lock as well. Have you seen lock on Tom Hardy?
No, no, you’re in a car with Tom Hardy for the whole, a bit like a better looking one foot in the grave.
That ever side of one foot in the garbage. Oh, yeah, they have one. Yeah, that’s all on there on the
motorway. sitcoms do that occasionally when they run out of budget and it’s called a bottle episode.
Right. Because it’s like a ship at a bottle. Right. I can’t. I think it’s in the world of comedy
writing. I guess it’s kind of a fun conceit, more like a play. Yeah, I don’t like it. No, I want
it. I want to see different places. Yeah, I’ll see. I quite enjoy it. Did you? People loved it.
It was one of the ones. I said at the beginning, it was one of the ones that was recommended.
Oh, you’ve got to see lock. It’s incredible. It’s amazing. Right.
I’m like, OK, so he’s in the back of a car. Where does he get out of the car?
So is it the fact that the, yeah, is it the recommend not being up to scratch that that
nickels you always is it the one location? Yeah, the one location. And that’s the same for TV and film.
I think I think if I discovered it of my own accord, then it would be a bit different.
It’s all about managing expectations. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But if someone says, oh my god,
you’ve got to see this thing with Tom Hardy. It’s amazing. And they don’t like if I was doing that,
I would say you’ve got to be OK with just one location.
With it all being in one room. You’re right. OK. I don’t think it’s spoiling it to say that it just
is one location. Do you like the interior of cars? Oh, well, I’ve got a great film recommended.
This is the one for you. Yeah, yeah. So I asked Tom Hardy, you don’t get him on? Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
More work related, I mean, this is all, well, I’ve also got long journeys by Mini Cab in here.
Although if it was with Tom Hardy driving that would actually improve it.
OK, OK. Here’s a slightly work related thing when I’m doing live shows and touring around,
which I used to do a bit more than I do now, but I still do sometimes.
Checking into a hotel and finding that it’s got a smoke alarm with a very bright green light on it.
Yeah. And actually just lights in general. There’s more and more devices in a hotel room. There’s the
light on the TV. Yeah. There’s the light on the clock, on the phone. There’s the smoke alarm lights.
And when you turn the light off, sometimes they’re incredibly bright. And there’s like a giant
jade pool of light in the middle of the room. It’s like a kind of Halloween environment.
And because of that, and I’ve had a few nights totally ruined by that when I was unprepared back in the day.
But now what I do is I carry tape around.
And actually I put the tape on my laptop.
Right. So that I don’t have to remember to carry around a roll of tape.
Just put strips of tape on the front of my laptop.
You know, I saw those earlier. Yeah.
And I thought there would be a good reason for those.
Well, quite good. Yeah. Oh, no, this is pretty good.
Because that’s the first thing I thought was, well, tape. He loves tape.
Yeah. No, not one of the three laptops. I mean, obviously, I had that strong mind.
This is a man who just has to have tape everywhere he goes. But no, just that that was the solution.
That’s the solution. But who remembers to carry around a roll of black
gaffer tape? No one. And it has to be black gaffer tape. Because otherwise the light is going to
just blaze through that thing. And so yeah, I get some tape and it even works. I even had a challenge
recently, which was ended up in a hotel room with a very high ceiling. All right. That was going to be
yeah. Okay. So what the hell do you do? But I smashed it. I did a loop of tape. And I didn’t smash
the line. That’s what I thought you meant. I just fell into a fit. I didn’t control the anger.
No, I didn’t look forward. I did consider smash the, I did consider throwing something heavy at it.
But no, that’s dangerous, illegal and would have been, would that have been your rock and roll hotel?
Yeah. That’s the like. Now I don’t think the TV went out the window. I would never recommend
disabling a smoke alarm. But this is my compromise. Anyway, I folded some tape back on itself,
made a little sticky loop. And then I found a broom like down. I went crawling around until I found
a broom. Maybe that the made was using. And I just put the tape at the end of the broom and I just
just stitched it up on top of the, oh, I felt pretty good. So did you have to leave the room for the
broom? Did you have to go and set? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But this was not a night. This was when I checked in.
Right, I was. Yeah, because I know now I’ve got to make sure that it’s all, I mean, the only thing I felt
bad about was obviously I didn’t take the tape. I was going to say, do you detape? Is that? I’d usually do,
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, usually detape, but not always. And I do feel that’s not cool. And I
apologize to any room cleaning professional that has had to remove one of my bits of tapes.
But I’ve all the horror that could be left behind in a hotel room. Yeah, I’ve been a tape
on a bright light. That’s true. I’ll swear. Yeah, the room is spotless. Let me tell you. I swear to you.
I’m recycling. Everything is sorted out ready for recycling. And there’s no pubes on that bathroom
floor. No way. I’m actually going to give you a little round of applause. Yeah, that’s good. None.
No one is picking up my pubes. Never. Or cloning me from the DNA fan there. I am getting some, I’m
getting, I’m quite obsessive about it. I don’t like the idea. There’s no, I apologize that this is
more information than you asked for or anyone needs, but there’s no smearing on the toilet bowl or
anything like that. It’s in good Nick. I don’t like the idea of making someone else clean up my shit.
Yeah, I mean, yeah. Yeah, well, that’s like we’re veering back into psychopath territory there.
I think if you are a person who likes the idea of having someone clear it up, then perhaps
I think some people do think, some people think, well, I guess a lot of people just don’t think about it.
Yeah, but other people just think, well, that’s your job. Yeah, yeah, I don’t think that is there.
No, I mean, it is technically it is there, but I also just think it doesn’t need to be there.
No, it, it, perhaps shouldn’t, it shouldn’t. Yeah, no. Yeah, so a little bit, a little bit of tape.
That’s, yeah, no, that’s fine. It’s on the minus column, but on the plus column, no punes.
And no punes on the bed as well. Yeah, I’m, I’m going to strip that bed.
You’re right. Oh, you’re stripping the bed? Yes. I was half-expert, and you just say take to the
other side of your laptop is a miniature keyboard Hoover, though. You then go over the bed.
Say take to the other side of your laptop is a large collection of pubic hair. The fluffy side.
Yeah, that’s key to keep it spun cushion. Yeah, very, well, those trays you get with all the
polysering beads in, yeah, that keep everything level on the back. There you go. You have a laptop puned
leveler. This is a great business idea. Well, I know, stop making suits immediately, or instead of
mo hair, anyway, let’s get moving on. But I’ve never even had this conversation before.
Frightenly, we have had that. Someone must have done it. Some performance artists, some kind of
leabary type, the must have made a suit of pubic hair. Yeah. So that could cover work and go, you know,
perhaps, yeah, going away, but we’ll, we’ll, I’ll take that for work, because that’s a, that’s part of
your journey. It’s, yeah, you know, staying away a lot. Is that, do you, are you bored of staying away a lot?
No, I don’t do it very often. Right. And I couldn’t manage along to the longest I’m ever
away is three, four nights. Right. Okay. Before I get home sick. But the longest I was ever away was
three and a half months when we went to me and Joe went to Japan. Right. Right. And that was hard
core. I think about that still. All right. I think is that really, was that pre-marriage? No, we were
married and our son, first son had just been born and he was very young. He was only six months old when
I went off. And so it felt like a weird thing to be doing. Yeah. And he got ill, but required my
wife to go to hospital a few times with him. And all of this was happening while I was sat there in
Tokyo having stressful video calls. So that was a bit, I mean, I love to Tokyo and it was wonderful
being there, but no, I wouldn’t want to go away for that long again. Yeah. It’s nice to do once in a while.
Yeah. That’s sort of, it’s, I quite enjoy the difference. Definitely. Especially if it’s somewhere
where you haven’t been before. Yeah. And then you, is that little bit of chance to explore somewhere?
Yeah. And I, I think the longest I would be away now is probably four or five weeks. Right.
Because my dream is to one day do one of those jungle type reality shows.
Oh, do you, would you do it? Well, I would do, I would do a Bear Grills one. I wouldn’t do I’m a celebrity.
No. Not that I’ve been asked. I’ve been asked to like, I’ve had an inquiry, they, but they ask
almost everyone in the right country. Right. And then they whittle it down. So I’ve been asked a
couple of times for that. But I got very close to being on the Bear Grills Island. Right.
That they used to do, but they stopped. In fact, I was, I said yes. And I was going to do it. But then
the pandemic happened. And it all got canceled. Do you think that will come back around? I’m hoping.
I don’t think it’ll come around in that form, that island format. Right. But I’m hoping that something
else will come along. And maybe I’ll, because I, I do feel like, well, I would like to see more of
the world. I used to travel a lot when I was young with my dad who was a travel writer. Yeah. But
then recently haven’t done so much. I guess maybe partly because, well, partly because the children
you know, have been young and also don’t have time. Also don’t necessarily want to fly. If you
feel guilty about flying a lot. So want to minimize that as far as possible. I’m a bit of a
petty right? Yeah. Not so much in the actual journey itself, but I’m not, my timekeeping isn’t my
strongest point. No. So the being somewhere on time or I’m very good at going, oh, I’ve got
loads of time and I haven’t. So it makes travel a bit as my family would say as we ran
from this one Euro star stop to the next because I said, yeah, we’ve got ages in between.
Gardinord to Gardalineal. Yeah. Well, yeah. So it’s, yeah, we kind of get off and then you meant
to change quite quickly, but I’d read the thing wrong. I was like, no, it’s always shuffling us through,
really slow. Yeah. All the small children go to the toilet. That’s absolutely fine. We’ve got plenty of time.
And we didn’t, we made it barely over the last people on as someone was sort of tutting at us,
and tapping their watch. And you will never hear the end of that story? No, as well. Yeah. Like,
my wife also has the same thing and she, one time we went on the Euro star, it was slightly stress,
it was kind of stressful. We, we, yeah, same sort of thing. We nearly missed it. And we just got on
there. Everyone was panting and and then she was, it was like it was the worst thing that had ever happened
to her ever. Yeah. Whatever, ever. It was fine. Yeah. I’m never doing that again. It’s fine. It’s better
than flying. It’s not better than flying. It’s so nice when you’re on there. Yeah, it’s great. Brilliant. Yeah,
it’s great. It’s great. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, that panicked run. I’ll do that for too much. Yeah.
But I’m with you on the lights on things. I don’t really like it. Yeah, I don’t like noise.
Either air conditioning is not good. Well, I don’t mind noise. I’m getting more, I actually have
a noise maker on my laptop. Right. I think the, is does that do the white noise in there? Yeah, it does
all the noise. Every noise. It does, it updated recently and now it’s got Lancaster bomber. Really?
Yeah. Right. So it’s like the roar of a propeller plane. Right. And it’s even got, it’s got
faders on it. This thing, it’s got, I’m not sponsored by them, but the app that I use is called My Noise.
And so you can bring the faders up and down because it’s even got radio communications.
Oh, really? A couple of channels. Yeah. So I tend to, I don’t want the radio communications.
I just want the runways. And is that for sleep? Yeah. That’s absolutely okay. Actually, well,
it’s also good on on a train. If you’re on a noisy train, you’re sat next to some guy who
thinks that his business call is something everybody needs to hear. Yeah. Then,
yeah, stick my headphones in and, right, put them last My Noise. Yeah. And can, can you still work
doing that or read? Yeah. I’ll have to be able to work. I don’t have to be able to read.
Oh, definitely, definitely. Because you’re, it just, you’re kind of cocooned and it focuses your
mind. Right. That’s great. What it does for me. Yeah. I’ll have to get, I do, I have got a sleep
sort of podcast that I listen to. It’s something just read. Yeah, the bugs and podcasts. Yeah,
that’s right. I’ll find my full sleep. Straight to my head. Until I go, bye. Yeah. Yeah. I don’t,
that would definitely, I don’t think I’ll be doing it. Yeah. You’re my car journey.
I have these things. I’ll do a full 40 minute journey in. So I manage to do one half on the way in
generally. Yeah. Then the other half on the way home. And then quite often, my wife will say to me,
why we even the car for so long? Because I’ll have two minutes left or three minutes,
so I’ll pull up at home and then sit in the car and just because I can’t leave two minutes.
So then start the next day with just a couple of minutes. Sure. You have to sort of finish it off
before you can go in. But it doesn’t like, sit as the, and the light will slowly go off in the car
as well. Yeah. So he fades off and was just sitting there in the car before I go in. And then you start
crying. Yeah. Yeah. I’m a jet of the week. Well, you know, I’m surprised my, yeah, if I was being sort of,
what I’d quite like is if I look tap on the window and a cup of tea presented maybe with a biscuit
so I could finish it off and come for that. I’d never get that. Not yet. Perhaps parents, I’ll suggest that.
That’s good. Yeah. So, but so that’s a good one.
Well, at Reston Player there are niggles from home. You don’t have to name nines if it’s directed at
a particular person. Oh man. Well, I mean half my career has been based on moaning about things
that is generally in the kitchen. Right. Seems to be the most high stress part of the house.
Fork bin drop scraping plate remains into a full bin and dropping the fork in by accident.
Then having to go on a fork hunt. Yeah. In back into the remains. Yeah. What was within a,
into the umscar. Yeah. That’s the shrinkers. That’s the way I say it. There’s no fish fingers left.
They’re all in my tummy. Yeah. Um, that’s a sad time wiping down when my wife sometimes wipes down
the kitchen surfaces with a smelly cloth. Yeah. What the hell is that? Yeah. And she’s got her
favorite weird cloths that she hangs over the tap. Yeah. And they stink. They always stink. And then
sometimes like when they’re new, it’s all good. Yeah. But it only takes a few days before they
leak. Yeah. And then occasionally she’s squeezing them out fully. Obviously not. I don’t know what
she’s doing. I think she’s dipping them in the toilet because it absolutely is like unholy the smell.
Really? And she’s fine with it. Like she can smell. I’ve got worse sense of smell than her. But she’s
like, oh yeah, that’s fine. Yeah. Everyone likes that smell. Right. See, just this afternoon,
well this morning before I left the house, I bleached the smelly cloths. Yeah. Every couple of
days of every week, never longer than a week. Yeah. A little bit of a week. Sometimes I’ll put them in the
washing machine sometimes. Right. Other times I will just put them in the bin.
Straight in the bin. Yes. Which is not cool because I don’t want to waste things unnecessarily.
But at the same time, I just want them out of my life in that way. Yeah. Yeah. So are you a
kitchen roll wiping down? And now I’ve got quite eccentric kitchen mopping habits. I like
to, I’m talking to, Bridget Christie about this on my podcast the other day. Right.
I quite like using a towel, like a bath towel. Wow. And I will just drench things and then just
wipe them down with the bath towel. With the bath towel. And then when the bath towel gets too
disgusting, I’ll just stick it in the wash. But I really like a bath towel. I like a sort of,
is that a two hand? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, two hand. It’s white, definitely. Oh,
right. So that’s what I’ll do. That is quite eccentric, I would say. Yeah. And I’ll put it
under really hot water for a little bit in there. Right. Steaming away and I’ll just steam everything
down. Like the end of an Indian meal. Yeah, yeah. That’s a hot towel. Hot towel kitchen rubbed
or a flight. I mean, they used to do that. Yeah, yeah, that’s true. In the old days, certainly,
they’d come around with their little towel sausages. And it was lovely. And you get a whole
face full of empty freshness or whatever. Which is quite nice with a bit. Is it your
quite bearded, the man? Yeah, I’m not. But when I had quite a long beard, I’d quite like,
you know, there’s one of my nickels that don’t like stuff in the moustache. No, who does?
Yeah, pirates. Pirates made with some people really. Yeah, especially cream cakes. Yeah,
yeah, at the worst. No, that’s not nice. No, nice. And then a hot towel was perfect. Yeah,
because cream cake. I mean, I don’t really like dairy. So, yeah, I could, I feel you,
rub cream cakes and then, and then it’s like they start going off. The cream starts going,
and all you can smell is cream cake, and you’ll go lit up. I forget. There’s a little part,
my memory that goes, I did need a cream cake. So then I’m spending the rest of the day going,
what is that smell? Can anybody else smell that? And then I would remember, oh, it’s my disgusting
start. It’s my rank face. It’s just honking up the room. But, yeah, so, yeah, so, but yeah,
I might try the two handy tail thing. I mean, I do it in private. I don’t, I do it when there’s no
one there, because I feel ashamed of it, some reason. But not ashamed enough to, you, you’re happy
to talk about it. You just don’t want, yeah, podcast is a special private space. Yeah, that’s true.
That is true. Nothing. What, what happens in the podcast is not the stays in the podcast? It’s not
cool to talk about what you heard, an middle aged man doing on the podcast and shane that person.
Never. It’s not okay. No, that’s, yeah. Now, I’ll, I’ll fully agree with that. I was, yeah, so,
yeah, I, I’m kitchen tops on, on with you on that smelly, yeah, yeah, I’m with you on that,
I don’t like crumbs on the top though, leaning on a kitchen top and having your arm coming away with
crumbs on it. That’s not, unless they’re delicious, then you can line them up and snort them.
Cocaine crumbs. Yeah, yeah, yeah, those finger crumbs. Yeah, sometimes. Yeah, yeah, I think that’s
I might have to ask a quick fish finger, a side, yeah, is that just sandwiches? No, no,
do the fish finger sandwiches? Sure, as a treat, as a treat. And is that what’s going in with the
fish finger? Not much. Any sources? Yeah, mayonnaise and ketchup. mayonnaise and ketchup? Yeah, yeah,
like what’s that called French dressing? Is it called? I don’t know, is that, or Thousand Island? I
think that’s one of the most wonderful marines of the school, yeah. Thousand Island. But,
the day I turned out that Thousand Island dressing was ketchup and mayonnaise. Yeah, okay. Yeah,
no, see, ever with tartar sauce in there? No, that’s good. That’s, of course, that’s a good idea,
but for some reason that’s just not part of the routine in the castle. Yeah, yeah, that’s right.
It’s good. And if you’re feeling one next level, a bit rocket in there as well. Yeah, it’s good.
I’m not Jamie Oliver. Hey, the pepper. It’s the pepper in there’s the rocket, you say. Of course.
You see, that’s a good illustration of how an adventurous I am when I’m left to my own devices.
Right. But, um, yeah, yeah, start, start yourself off just with a tartar sauce. That’s,
that’s my recommend. I’ll build up to it. Yeah, yeah. 60th birthday. That’s what’s happening there. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So that’s work. That’s home. Yeah. What about going out? Are there any, you know, if you’ve got
any sort of last things that sort of automatically spring to mind about, you know, we’ve kind of
done travel that is there going out or an evening out or even just leaving the house, might be? Yeah,
I have to confess that when things get cancelled, I feel pretty happy. Like when people cancel plans
and going out things, it’s like, oh, thank you. You just gave me the bonus time gift. Yeah.
And you have the sort of, I’ve got to often now tell myself, I’ll have a good time when I’m out.
Won’t you, I will be fine. Well, which is true. Yeah, it’s always good to go and ask that. Yeah, just
the older you get, the more generalisation there is. And for me, the problem sometimes is just my,
the practical problem of cycling everywhere. Yeah, because I go on with Brompton. Very nice.
Thank you very much. But then it is a drag to carry it around everywhere you go. It’s heavy,
it’s kind of annoying. There’s not really room. Sometimes if you go into a busy pub or whatever,
so sometimes I’ll chain it up, but you’re not really supposed to chain up a Brompton. This is incredibly
boring. Now, there will be somebody out there going, these are good Brompton facts that I need to know.
You know, I suppose the chain up a Brompton because it’s such a high value item that your average
thief is going to do whatever they can to get hold of that Brompton. Right. And they’ll even strip it for parts.
So, well, what rest of the play we’ve done that it is time for the hat. The hat. The cuff.
Off the hat cuff. The hat. The hatty cuff. Thank you Stuart. The beautifully made little bits of
paper here. There in the hat cuff, there was little bits of paper which… And what is written
on my bit of paper is pubs. So, pubs, are there any niggles or do you love everything about the pub?
Do you even go to the pub? Sure. Yeah. There’s a great pub nearby us. Yeah. And it’s won many awards
and the owner is nice and they do food and it’s all cozy inside but they have music. Right. Which I believe
other pubs also do. And actually, it’s usually fine but occasionally you go in there and the only
table they’ve got is right underneath the speaker. Right. And you’ve got sharp hits coming at you.
Loud and proud. Pretty loud. Right.
And I really object to it and sometimes I have asked them to turn it down in the past but I just
feel like such a prick. Yeah. Yeah. My dad was definitely, he would ask people to turn it down.
I had a bit in my book room where I remembered a time when we were in Barbados. Right.
And we were at a reggae festival. We’ve been taken to a reggae festival by the head of PR in Barbados
while my dad was there in his travel writer capacity. Yeah. I was very young. I must be in a five or six
very little. Never been to a reggae concert at that point. So reggae concert in Barbados.
It was very overwhelming, incredibly loud. We must have been the only white people there I think. So
everything about it just felt overwhelming to me. You know, I was like, wow, we look totally different
from everyone here. It was quite weird to have it that way round. And my dad just leaned over to the
PR person and said, could you get them to turn it down? And the PR person laughed, you know,
because he thought he was joking. But then she realized he wasn’t joking. And I think they may have
even asked them to turn it down. I think she said, okay, they’re going to turn it down, Mr. Bucston.
So I don’t know if they actually did or not. But that was even then. I knew I don’t think that’s
cool. I don’t think it’s cool to be in someone else’s country at their reggae festival and ask them
to turn it down. I mean, there wasn’t a lot of hope of that happening, really. But well, this was in
the 70s and my dad at that point was kind of a powerful travel. I mean, I’m sure they didn’t turn it down.
No, but I wanted him to think that perhaps. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh my god, this is the entitlement
that my dad must have had to be able to do that. So even, even in a pub feeling like, oh, I’d love
it if the music was slightly less loud. I don’t generally do it. So what I do instead is I just
like the speaker. Do you? Yeah. Now that’s bold. I wait till they’re not looking at me and just
take the cable out. And I put it back in when we’re leaving. Like the tape? Well, actually,
unlike the tape because sometimes the tape stays on there. But now I’ll put the cable back in.
I know that’s a total handle. But is that wanting to talk? Would you do it if, even if you didn’t,
if you were on your own, would you then be with the bomber? Would you then be the Lancaster?
I mean, I’m generally not on my own in the pub. Yeah. But yeah, I would prefer it to be quiet
on the whole. Yeah. I do agree, you know, it depends. I guess it depends on the mood. But if it’s a
Sunday afternoon and you’re with your friends, you haven’t seen your friends for a long time,
you’re looking forward to talking and you’re underneath the speaker. It’s really a sad thing. So
I feel justified in just popping out that cable. Yeah. That is a big, good, yeah. Ed Sheeran’s still
going to be there when the cable goes back in. That is true. He’s not going anywhere. He’s not going
anywhere. And I think it’s okay. And it’s not as if there’s anyone else around me who is absolutely,
you know, it’s like if we were in an environment where people, hey, everyone’s singing along,
I’m not going to go and pull the cable out. But do you think I just are going back slightly to
your dad? Do you think subconsciously that’s where the seat for bad dad came from? Yeah. I think
that sort of memory of, let’s put dad in that situation. Yeah. Well, he was always hated all that stuff.
He ain’t sort of popped music, loud music. I mean, that’s the thing. I agree with him there with the
loud music, with the kind of inescapable music. Yeah. The idea that you have to have music everywhere
you go. Yeah. Yeah. I think I kind of agree with that. The tyranny of being surrounded. Yeah. Yeah.
Music glaring everywhere as if the worst thing in the world is to be left with your own thoughts.
It’s a funny one, is it? I quite often think when people are just walking somewhere and they’ve got
earphones in, I think, well, you’re not hearing the world around you. Yeah, but maybe they’re listening
to the Adam Bucks in podcast. In which case? In which case? Forgivable. They have one. They are
winning at life. They are winning at life. Yeah. Well, I’d agree with that. You know, podcasts are a
wonderful thing and yours is a wonderful podcast. Thanks very much. That’s all right. I’m
embarrassed that I managed to bring it around to that. Well, and that’s probably a good place for
us to stop on the wonderfulness that is your podcast. Right. It’s very surreal being on the other side
of it, actually. And hearing your voice and being able to see you at the same time, usually,
you’re just coming out of, well, you’re coming out of the speakers in the doors, but I think if you
was coming out of the center of the, this is my face. Look at smuggers you thought it would.
Well, I’ve seen your face in person once before, actually. It didn’t look smugged there.
Not smugged there. You’re all right. You pass. Perhaps that’s the hat, though. Perhaps the hat is
the anti-smug hat. That’s right. That’s what it is. Now the peak’s gone. It gives me gravitas.
I look gravitas. Just come from the docks. Yeah. Wives. A Wives. You mean Kevin Rowland. We’ve been down
there unloading shipments from across the sea. Across the sea, going and playing some
chilelli music. Chilelli music? I don’t know what I’m talking about. Let’s go. Well, let’s end it there.
Thank you so much. Thanks so much. Good to talk to you.
[Music]
So there we have it. A massive thank you to Adam for coming down and being our guest.
We’ve all been fans for such a long time. It was a pleasure to spend some time in his company
and to tell you for him too. I can’t say I agree with his kitchen cleaning routine, but each to their own.
A big thank you as well to Dap Hazar as always for the wonderful music on the podcast.
Editing and production was done by Stuart Wilson, incredible as always. And thanks to Sam for
keeping us organised and on track. I’m Stuart Harbourn, your host and this podcast was tailored for you
by Hardman and Hammer. Until next time, try not to get too surety.
[Music]
[Music]
[Music playing]